Bang Head Here

Don't get me wrong - my general outlook is all sunshiney and I am grateful to have my health, my reignited weight loss, my dad's improving health (and my mother's!), my business, my man, my life, etc., etc.

BUT SERIOUSLY, WHAT EFFING GIVES? You hear me, Universe? I'm screaming "Uncle!"

I've been trying really hard not to complain about the bubonic plague-like illness I contracted after 10+ days in and out of the hospital during my dad's health crisis. Trying. So. Hard. It just seemed shitty to be complaining about anything after the gift I'd just received. Plus, at first, I was so consumed by the insanity of all that was happening - and all of the work the situation created for me - that I actually managed to just about ignore the mounting illness. Hell, I thought it was Hay Fever for about a week.

Then, by Wednesday of last week, the sore throat, cough, sinus pain and pressure and ultimately, the low grade fever, were all but impossible to ignore. That's especially true considering that I was helping to care for a recovering heart surgery patient AND a mom with little to no immune system to speak of - that I could kill them kinda scared me straight.

So I tapped out of the recovery ring for a few days to recover myself. Honestly, minus the pain and pain-induced sleep deprivation, spending three straight days in jammies on a recliner with my full DVR was pretty damn awesome. Then, blammo!

My boyfriend got it.

He had started to feel ill about a day or so after I did...but he didn't get REALLY sick until this weekend. In fact, the cold hit him way harder than it hit me. Poor guy has no appetite (who would, when it feels like your swallowing fire AND knives?), he has no energy, he's exhausted and sleep-deprived and he's just at his wit's end. Since he has a 9-5 job, it's harder for him to take off consecutive days of work like I can - it's not like he can make up those days over a few weekends. Once he burns them, they're gone.

Plus, and this is no slight on him (just so you know hon - cause I know you read these) - having another sick person to care for really puts a wrench in the routine - a routine that's been completely blown to bits over the past 3 weeks.

I've worked so hard to establish my lifestyle, my eatstyle and my workouts. I also am desperately trying to hold onto the weight loss bonus I received over the course of dad's health fustercluck.

Plus, tomorrow...I have to go back to my parents for the day and do errands and chores. I'm glad to do it - really, I am - but it's just another day that's not a regular day.

I'm off to work out now - like I really mean it - but to say that I'm hanging on by my fingernails is an understatement. I'm desperately trying to hold on to my motivation...but man, this is hard.

Of course, considering all that's gone on in the past few weeks - that I have any motivation at all is a miracle. Onwards and Downwards!