The good news: I didn't gain it ALL back.
The honest news: I damn near did.The better news: I've already lost 34 of it again.
I'm working out and eating clean and not beating myself up too much about it. Everyone has their fair share of issues - and I much prefer my brand to some of the others I've been exposed to of late.
Bought an exercise bike, too. I find it to be about as good an "I don't wanna" buster as it gets. I mean...you're working out while sitting on your ass in front of the tv, if you're really smart. What's that little lazy voice in the back of my head? Yeah, I didn't think so.
One thing I know that DOES work for me - a ticking clock. Losing for our wedding in '12 (and the photos) was about as big a motivator as it gets. This time around, I've set up a few more.
The first - and the reason for the 50 I hope to have gone by the time we leave - is a cross-country train, plan and automobile trip in mid-April. Amtrak's Cali Zephyr to San Fran, a few days in the Bay City and then off to Vegas for a Megadeth Motorhead one night only show. Can't. Friggin. Wait. Of course, being less gigundo-huge will make travel a heck of a lot easier - and meeting my husband's super cool cousins while out there and possibly meeting up with some in his family who last saw me skinnier is an even bigger mental nudge.
The next - another trip later in the year to Cancun - so, bathing suit...yipe!
The third - and most exciting - is that I'm going to be an aunt again! And, like the wedding, there will be lots of pictures of my holding my new "niecephew". I fully intend to look fabulous in them...even though I'll be the only one looking at ME in the damn shots. Why are all fatties (and former fatties) such narcissists? Jeez.
Now that I've confessed to being a dope and allowing myself to fall down the carbolicious rabbit-hole again...I feel better. Kinda. Well, at least I'm motivated!
So, it's 63 down. %$&* left to re-lose...and then we shall see what more I'm willing to do (if anything) beyond that.
2 comments:
"Niecephew"? Love it! Good for you on not beating yourself up! We're cut from a similar cloth so I know what a huge step that is. I don't think it's narcissistic to want to look great in a picture - no matter what the situation! The sad reality is if one looks bad in a picture it will stand out - especially if that one is female. You can do it!
Yeah, that's what I've called all three of the gestating newbies...until I know what he/she is, he/she has got to have an identity! True about pics ...and I'm not beating myself up NOW. I'm not in any way suggesting that my guilt and I went at least 10 rounds prior to this post.
Post a Comment